Monday, May 29, 2006

The Return of How To Get Here

And you thought there were no new ways to get to Attention Span... how foolish of you! Just look at the new routes to Attention Span!

The Extended Attention Span Training System - My new 6 week course being offered one week a year for the next quadrennium. (Let's see how extended everyone's attention span is on this one.)

gilligan's island hybels - Not Gilligan, but maybe the Professor...
Posted by Picasa Posted by Picasa

bill hybels and aunt edna hell - Not Aunt Edna, but what about Dame Edna?
Posted by Picasa Posted by Picasa Hell is a whole 'nother topic.


are rutabegas good for you - What were those four basic food groups again? Grain... milk... sugar... brussel sprouts... Nope. Rutabegas will kill you. It's official.

does jimmy buffett still slobber - If he doesn't, it's gotta be hard swallowing a cheeseburger in paradise.

nude in Egypt - It's a small village just down the road from Cairo. Lots of tourists, but they never visit more than once.

the secret to being a good dunker - Use a big cup and not too much glaze on the donut.

legs april indianapolis flat tire blood - Sounds like a bad experience with a tow truck, doesn't it?

free question and answer on pastor or preacher - ORDER TODAY!! WITH EVERY PASTOR OR PREACHER WE SELL, YOU GET A FREE QUESTION. BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE! WE'LL THROW IN, ABSOLUTELY FREE, A FREE ANSWER! NOW HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY??

lyrics from songs i sang with pastor ed at the all star week - Well, I did some things during all star week I now regret. And what happens in Vegas is supposed to stay in Vegas. But since we really knocked 'em dead during the big variety show, here's what we sang:
Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl
with yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there
she would merengue and do the cha-cha
and while she tried to be a star
Tony always tended bar
across the crowded floor, they worked from 8 til 4
they were young and they had each other
who could ask for more?
At the copa (CO!) Copacabana (Copacabana)
the hottest spot north of Havana (here)
at the copa (CO!) Copacabana
music and passion were always in fashion
At the copa....

Also, always in fashion, is the road to Attention Span coming from the Christian Carnival, which was posted this past week at Wittenburg Gate.

6 comments:

julie said...

Bill Hybels most get a lot of traffic!

Kristen said...

LOL! These are consistently priceless. :-D

Kim said...

I'm with Kristen; you always get the good 'uns.

Pastor Jon said...

Ed, that was classic "Attention Span."
Thanks!
Did you know that dolphins are so intelligent that, within only a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand at the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

Jon

Rodney Olsen said...

Love that song. "... and when she finished, he called her Rover ..."

Umm, maybe not. Maybe he called her over.

MLight said...

Again! Maybe I shouldn't have kept reading...